Okay so I come home for the weekend and agree to meet friends both Friday and Saturday night! Lush!! it feels like ages since I’ve seen or done something fun with anyone from home! Yes I drank a lot Friday night but I stayed at a friends house cool ok like I let mum know!! But then another friend suggests going out out for a night out which again is cool but mum requests I don’t come home drunk and plastered spewing everywhere which Is understandable!! But I haven’t drank alcohol in ages
I quickly find myself necking the alcohol back so quickly because who doesn’t love that body of self confidence you get when your drinking and chatting with your besties who you haven’t seen in ages! I’ve been a stress head recently there is a lot going on in my little head I’m not gunna lie and uni is one stress after another and for that time it’s nice to forget the stress head Chloe and just be chilled! But of course that alcohol hits and chilled Chloe becomes a wreck head and a mess!! This isn’t the first time this has happened I feel like it’s the numbness that I enjoy you feel as if the world can’t get to you! And then I keep drinking to keep that don’t worry be happy vibe alive! Or maybe it’s because the world has been getting to me recently was the reason I drank way to much? I feel at the moment I’ve kept quiet and told everyone I was fine but I’m struggling at the moment I’m finding it tough to keep going! Anyway I know I shouldn’t use alcohol like that and that’s partly why I am writing this I’m not allowing myself justification at all I can’t justify getting that shit faced because it’s just stupid!!
I thought I was over the drinking tonnes to forget my life stage but obviously not! And that frustrates me because I know it’s just a waste of time crying into an empty bottle!
Thanks for reading
Little Mayfly x